rector major
and maybe I would have a real need ... Please don't
think that it doesn't cost me too, after having
appointed someone to do a job or after having sent
some errand either delicate or of concern, and not
finding it done in time or even badly done, that it
doesn't cost me to keep calm; I assure you that
sometimes the blood boils in my veins, a tingling
dominates all senses. So what? Get Impatient? Don't
you see that the job not done is done, and even
corrects itself with fury". And I ended with a thought
very dear to me: "What sustains patience must be
hope. This supports us, were we to lack patience".
Many times I realized not to have been understood,
even by someone I was roughly 'told off' about the
method by which (especially in the early years) I was
training my future Salesians. Can I justify myself by
claiming that I was opening up a new path. I brought
out a totally different experience, but I didn't go
blindly. I just contented myself to be as prudent as
possible, even though my view went further. A few
decades later, doing a re-scanning of the path I was
walking and recalling the challenges faced, I said:
"Many clerics were staying in bed in the morning,
some were not going to school, they were not doing
spiritual reading, nor meditation ... I saw all those
disorders and I left that to be brought forward as one
could. If I wanted to get rid of all the riots at once, I
would have to close the Oratory and send away all the
young people, because the clerics would not have
adapted to strict rules, and would all go away. I saw
that of those clerics who also went away many
worked willingly, were of good heart, of wholly
proven morality, and, beyond that the fervor of youth,
I would then have helped a lot. And I have to say that
several of the priests of the Congregation, who were
part of that number, are now among those who work
more, have a better ecclesiastical spirit, while they
certainly went away rather than submit to certain
restrictive rules ... If everything went to perfection I
would have been reduced to a small group, not
having finished anything. "
The art of knowing how to wait
A good farmer had learned to wait, learning and
practising the lesson of patience, I remembered
hearing many times from my mum a saying filled
with wisdom: "By walking you lighten the burden of
the donkey". This was the most common means of
transport, safe and economical. The goods were
divided into parts with equal weights on both sides of
the animal through two large saddlebags or baskets.
During the journey, the inevitable jolts ended up with
having to adjust the load. This memory of my
childhood made me say later: "When I encounter a
difficulty I do what one does going down the street
and at a certain point is blocked by a large boulder. If
you can't get it out of the way, you get over or around
it. Or, leave the job begun unfinished, in order not to
lose time in unnecessary waiting, put your hand to
something else. However, do not lose sight of the
interrupted initial work. For over time, the fruits
ripen, men change, the difficulties are smoothed out".
Towards the end of my life, with the number of
confreres increasing, it had become impossible to
write a couple of lines to each one personally. I sent a
circular to all my Salesians to wish them a year
blessed by Lord enriched with many initiatives. In
1884 (6th January) I wrote: "Do we want to go to
heaven in a carriage? We are in fact religious not to
enjoy, but – through sacrifice – to obtain merits for the
other life. Take heart, therefore, my dear and beloved
children. Let's move on. It will cost us effort, there
will be hardships: we shall reply: If the size of the
award fascinates us, we must not be scared of all the
hardships that we must undergo to deserve it".
Death was at home in Valdocco. But it wasn't the
heavy and lugubrious atmosphere that some authors
have described. Every month I offered the boys and
the Salesians the Exercise of the Happy Death, a
devotional practice that already existed. It was a
plunge into the solemn mysteries of eternity. I, the
educator of joy and healthy fun, predicted with great
naturalness the imminent deaths of teenagers, not to
scare them, but to make their love of life grow in
them. I was able to spread peace even when I spoke of
death, because the last word was about Paradise. I was
talking about it as a child speaking about their dad's
house. The boys who died in Valdocco spoke with
ease and conviction of heaven, as their home,
accepted messages from classmates and their
teachers, were dying with a smile on their face. I
remembered without doubt a phrase that I loved to
repeat: "Paradise pays everything". The death became
an irresistible appeal to goodness of a God who
forgives, who welcomes children and feasts with
them.
Due to my training, I wasn't very inclined to accept
external forms of exaggerated penances. I had to
restrain that holy boy called Dominic Savio and rule
out any kind of mortification. Let him only “bear with
patience the insults if someone insults thee, bear with
patience the heat, cold, wind, rain, tiredness and all
those difficulties of health that God allows". It was
what I advised everyone: "To make up in themselves
the sufferings of Jesus, the ways are not lacking there
are: heat, cold, illness, people, events. These are the
means to live humbly". I gathered my thoughts with
this expression: " to kiss the cross is not enough; you
have to carry it ".
ZMB Salesian Newslink
5