To the Provincial Fr Giacomo Costamagna

E IX, 4231

"The preventive system is our own. Never use harsh punishments; never use humiliating words or severe reprimands in front of others. But in the classrooms, let the words gentleness, charity and patience be heard. Never use harsh words, never give a slap, whether hard or light. Use negative punishments, and always in such a way that those who are warned become our friends more than before, and never leave us feeling discouraged.

Mathi, 10 August 1885

Dear and ever beloved Fr Costamagna,

The time for our spiritual exercises is approaching, and I, who see myself in my twilight years, would like to have all my sons and our sisters in America with me. Since this is not possible, I have decided to write you a letter that may serve as a guide for you and our other confreres to become true Salesians in your exercises, which are not far removed from ours.

First of all, we must bless and thank the Lord who, with his wisdom and power, has helped us overcome many serious difficulties that we were truly incapable of overcoming on our own. Te Deum, Ave Maria.

Then I would like to give everyone a sermon, or rather a conference on the Salesian spirit that must animate and guide our actions and all our words. The Preventive System must be our own. Never use corporal punishment; never use humiliating words or severe reprimands in the presence of others. But in the classrooms, let the words gentleness, charity and patience be heard. Never use harsh words, never give a slap, whether hard or light. Use negative punishments, and always in such a way that those who are warned become our friends more than before, and never leave us feeling discouraged.

Never grumble against the orders of superiors, but tolerate things that are not to our liking, or are painful or unpleasant. Every Salesian should be a friend to all, never seek revenge; be quick to forgive, but do not bring up things that have already been forgiven.

The orders of superiors should never be criticised, and everyone should strive to set and promote a good example. Everyone should be constantly encouraged and reminded to promote religious vocations, both among sisters and brothers.

Gentleness in speech, in action, and in giving advice wins over everything and everyone.

This should be your guideline and that of others who will take part in the forthcoming preaching of the exercises.

Give everyone a great deal of freedom and trust. Anyone who wishes to write to his superior, or who receives a letter from him, should not allow anyone else to read it, unless the recipient himself wishes to do so. On the most difficult points, I strongly advise inspectors and directors to hold special conferences. Indeed, I recommend that Don Vespignani be very clear about these matters and explain them to his novices or candidates with due prudence.

As far as possible, I wish to leave the Congregation without any embarrassment. Therefore, I intend to appoint a Vicar General who will be my alter ego for Europe, and another for America. But you will receive appropriate instructions in this regard in due course.

It is very appropriate that you gather the rectors of your Province together a few times a year to suggest the practical guidelines indicated above. Read and inculcate the reading and knowledge of our rules, especially the chapter that speaks of the practices of piety, the introduction I made to our rules themselves, and the deliberations taken in our general or particular chapters.

You see that my words would require much explanation, but you are certainly able to understand and, where necessary, communicate them to our confreres.

As soon as you can, present yourself to the Archbishop, Monsignor Espinosa, his Vicars General, Fr Carranza, Dr Terrero and other friends, and offer each and every one of them your humble and affectionate respects, as if I were speaking to one person.

May God bless you, dear Fr Costamagna, and with you, bless and keep all our confreres and sisters in good health, and may Mary Help of Christians guide you all on the path to heaven. Amen.

Pray for me, all of you.

Your most affectionate friend in Jesus Christ

Fr John Bosco