A HOME, A FAMILY, A FATHER

«One thing only do I remember, and it’ s my earliest memory. We were all going out from the room where he had died, and I insisted on staying behind.

«My grieving mother addressed me, ‘Come John, come with me.’ »

«If papa’s not coming , I don’t want to come,’ I answered. »

«My poor son, » my mother replied, «come with me; you no longer have a father. »

Having said this, she broke down and started crying as she took me by the hand and led me away. I began crying because she was crying. »

Don Bosco’s first memory is his mother’s hand. When he gets to know the boys in the Turin prisons he will say: «If they find a helping hand and someone to take care of them … they set themselves to live a good life, they forget the past, and become good Christians and upright citizens. This is the origin of our Oratory.»

Reflecting on his boyhood experiences and the process that led to him setting up his Work, Don Bosco, in the Memoirs of the Oratory, highlighted the determining role of the educators and of the surroundings in which his formation took place: his family, the Morialdo parish community, the school at Chieri, the Seminary, the Turin Ecclesiastical College (Convitto); the caring attention of Mamma Margaret and of Don Calosso, the support of his teachers at Chieri, the welcoming approach and the advice of his confessor, his good friends, the stimulating example of Luigi Comollo, the disciplined structure provided by the Superiors in the seminary, the pastoral and spiritual example and the teaching of Don Cafasso and Don Guala.

The roots of his strength

Also the circumstances of poverty and the hard peasant’s life in which he grew up played an important role in encouraging in him attitudes of trust in God, a spirit of hard work and determination, of sober living and of creativity. The conflict with Anthony was not entirely negative, since it increased his desire and stimulated his inventiveness in finding, in not very favourable circumstances, possibilities, alternative means for turning the dream into reality. So too, the problems encountered in the first years of the Oratory arising from the Prefect of the City, the parish priests, the Marchioness of Barolo, or even the lack of economic resources, of space, of collaborators were not only obstacles but challenges which stimulated his creative charity and led him to formulate a strategy for action that was all his own. He developed a proactive adaptation mentality in doing good, a trusting attitude which came from his confidence in God and led him to do whatever could be done, while waiting for the opening up of further opportunities in the future; an openness to change or to quick adaptation when faced by the unexpected or by obstacles which he knew how to get around with cheerfulness and intelligence. He also developed a style, based on relationhips and communication aimed at keeping people informed and aware of what was happening, and involving them, which was to be decisive in the future.

The people who loved him

Above all, the people who had formed him, their educational dedication, their care, assistance and accompaniment, their example and encouragement, were for him a important resource. In fact they shaped his process of formation, and at the same time they became a point of reference and a model of spirituality, of the choice of life, of paternal relationships, of care and of assistance, of dedication… which gave him an effective model on which to base his preventive system and his way of working. Years later, looking back at these people and their approach, Don Bosco drew out important consequences for his own system.

The surroundings in which he was formed

The circumstances of life in which his education took place were also very influential in the drawing up of his model of formation: a poor and hard-working family, the supportive peasant community at Morialdo, the atmosphere of the school in Chieri (where “religion was a fundamental part of the education”), the serious spirit of discipline and spiritual atmosphere of the Seminary, the fervent climate at the Turin Ecclesiastical College (Convitto). All these experiences made a real contribution to forming in him an idea and the practical realisation of an educational community, of a religious community, of human relationships, of the various educational roles, a sense of belonging and of collaboration.

A network for growing up

In the thought and practice of Don Bosco there can be no education unless it takes place within a well-organised/regulated and hard working community, peaceful and friendly, and within a close network of human relationships established by affectionate and attentive educators, who are present with the young in an active and stimulating way which is capable of opening up horizons, appreciating talents and putting them to good use, shaping characters and leading them along the paths of the interior life, with reason, religion and loving kindness.